Throughout our lives as elite soccer players there are many defining moments--some of them are those to celebrate and some, unfortunately, are disappointments. What I've realized as I am about to enter my eighth season as a professional player, is that the pattern doesn't end. You never get to a level where you are exempt from the ups and downs. Every single player--from the women on the U.S. National Team to you guys and all of your teammates--faces the same rollercoaster ride. Our confidence can be wonderfully high or shockingly low. There are great moments when you feel like all the hard work is worth it, and the times when you question why you are doing what you do and why you care so much. This is exactly why I see what I do as a journey. Whether it's something like signing day, a major tryout or selection time, a devastating injury, a championship game, or even the World Cup, what we experience are a series of moments. Some stand out to us as important moments that in some way or another define who we are and our passion for soccer. But even the most important moments, whether they seem to go in your favor or not, are fleeting.
My college coach always used to tell us that we should "live on a never-ending path of ascension." I honestly didn't know why he would say that so much, but now I think I get it. So much of our lives within and outside of this game we love are out of our control. A lot of times, even if we do everything to the best of our ability, results come down to timing, a ref's decision, coach's opinion, or collective series of events that we don't directly create. So how can we take back control in a situation in which we have so little? The answer is by focusing on constant improvement.
I remember being in high school and having teammates who committed to colleges and then decided to coast. I have been teammates of youth national team players who got to the college game then completely fell off. I have also witnessed college walk-ons become starters and team captains. Similarly, I have seen college stars not make pro teams and players who played for small schools I hadn't heard of have long pro careers as starters on their teams.That's because what we do every single day determines who we are as players and people so much more so than any one moment.
It is the cumulative effect of getting better every day that we participate in this wild and crazy game that will determine who we are. That is not to say that we should discount the important moments. It's just that our daily focus should not be on those. Our daily focus should be on constant improvement--the never-ending path of ascension.
I was a part of the U16 National Team. But after a few camps, a coach told me I wasn't athletic enough to play at the highest level. I went on to make the U17 and then U19 National Team, and was selected to go to the U19 World Championship in Thailand. I barely played at that tournament, and spent most of the games on the bench for all 90 minutes. I went to my dream college, UNC, and won 2 National Championships. I was named captain for two years, but it certainly wasn't easy and many times my teammates saw me in tears. I became a professional player. But I sat the bench a lot during my first season and my confidence was very low. It is my dream to play for the U.S. National Team. I have been on and off the team for about 8 years and have 26 caps. But I was cut twice and recently have not been part of the team pool at all. I was part of FC Kansas City, the NWSL Championship team, this past season. I had a great experience, but had to learn to play a new position, and didn't play much during the end of the season.
My point in telling you this is that my career is full of many moments for which I am supremely grateful and very proud. But it also has been full of struggles, disappointments, and trials. The one thing that has kept me going is my commitment to be better today than I was yesterday. And better tomorrow than I am today. That is the only thing I can control. So whether you are the current star of your team and just signed a letter of intent to go to your dream school, or whether you are struggling at the moment to find success, stick with it. The days of work add up and as long as you're moving in the right direction, and always making progress, you will have no regrets. The only thing we can do as players is commit to living on a never-ending path of ascension. And if you can do that, you can have faith that you're doing it right!
Be sure to come by the Zone at ECNL TX to give this skill challenge a try!
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